


First Dates and Other Disasters

by Shadowhuntercat



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alec kicks people a lot, Alternate Universe - Criminals, Because clizzy is great, Everyone is angry with Magnus, Except Alec and Izzy, How Do I Tag, Izzy is perfect, Kinda, M/M, Malec, Max is alive, Maybe clizzy later, Mostly malec though, for now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 16:18:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8720455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowhuntercat/pseuds/Shadowhuntercat
Summary: In which everyone has broken a lot of laws, Magnus has annoyed a lot of powerful people, Jace is obnoxious, Izzy is awesome and Alec just wants to go on a date without being held at gunpoint.(None of this is in any particular chronological order)





	1. Chapter 1

How on earth, Alec thought (not for the first time), had he changed so much in so little time? How had he gone from law student to criminal in less than a year? If he could, would he change it? Of course, there were some things he couldn't un-see.  
Blood staining the floor and the unmoving corpse of the first man he had killed.  
His own bruised reflection staring back at him from the mirror - the aftermath of calling Sebastian Verlac things he probably shouldn't have.  
The bright, sterile hospital corridor as Max was wheeled away from him on a stretcher.  
But would he change the look on Izzy's face the first time they had enough money to buy the dress she loved? Or meeting Magnus? Or even the time he had been able to spend with Jace, pushing away the worry his brother no longer wanted him?  
It wasn't all awful, he thought. Sometimes it was fun. He loved the rush of relief when an operation went off without a hitch and the excitement of planning some large scale crime with such precision he knew it wouldn't fail. And, to be honest with himself - which he always tried to be, no matter how horrible the truth - a small, cruel part of him enjoyed the power: the way people avoided him when he was annoyed, seeing the fear and respect when they looked at him, the way Jace and Izzy no longer saw him as their soft big brother who helped flies out of windows instead of killing them (even though he still didn't kill flies). Sure, it was exhausting and draining and terrifying, he thought, but it was worth it. 

The first time Alec killed someone was still burned into his mind. He knew every detail by heart - the way his green eyes dulled, the sound of his body hitting the floor, the pattern the blood sprayed onto a wall. It had started as a meeting. A resolution to a fight in Central park. Amicable and controlled, until the man had attacked him. If Alec hadn't seen the way his muscles tensed and the glint of the blade in the late evening light, he'd be dead. Simple as that.  
It was almost scary how many times he'd almost died, but as time wore on, his thoughts had gone from 'oh my god, I'm going to die, help me, someone save me' to 'again? Why is it always me?'.  
The man had lunged at him and knocked him to the ground, sending sharp pains through his back. So Alec hit him, hard, in the face and felt bone crack under his knuckles and warm blood trickling down his wrist. The knife collided with the floor beneath him and buried itself in the wood. Alec wasn't even sure where the gun had come from, he had just felt the cold metal in his hand and instinct took over. He swung the weapon up and it collided with the man's face as he stumbled to his feet, sending him staggering back. Alec didn't even hesitate, he aimed and fired in one fluid movement and watched blood splash the cream walls. He watched him gasping for breath and the green of his eyes go from spring meadow to broken glass as he stood up and waited to feel something. The bullet hit him in the left lung, shattering three ribs, exactly where Alec had aimed it because apparently he could use a gun as well as a bow and he never missed.  
He watched him die. It took a few more minutes for it to sink in. He had killed someone. And that was how Alec Lightwood became a murderer.

~

"Okay, I get that I just called your brother some rather unflattering things, but is the gun really necessary?"  
Magnus put his hands up in surrender and tried not to stare at the (admittedly very good looking) guy pointing a weapon at him.  
"Are you armed?" The blonde idiot (Trace? Something like that) asked, and Magnus tried not to roll his eyes because it was literally impossible to conceal anything with his outfit.  
"I'm pretty sure he isn't, Jace," the dark haired girl next to him sighed, "His clothes are so tight I'm surprised he isn't losing circulation,"  
Magnus was about to reply when she grinned at him and said "I love your style by the way. If my brother doesn't shoot you, maybe we could trade jewellery,"  
She did, Magnus noted, have excellent taste in jewellery if the beautiful red pendant around her neck and the serpentine silver bracelet curling up her arm were anything to go by. He decided he definitely liked her. And probably at least one of her brothers. Most likely the tall one with stunning blue eyes (they reminded him of the sea in Lima during his trip to Peru).  
"Iz, now is not the time to make friends," her older brother snapped.  
Raphael had said his name was Alexander Lightwood, meaning that his sister must be Isabelle and the blond guy someone was Magnus decidedly didn't care about.  
"Look," Magnus said, because he really didn't want to be killed that night, even if it was by one of the most attractive guys he had ever seen, "I didn't realise this building was occupied. I was looking for somewhere to be so my roommates couldn't rope me into playing scrabble,"  
Alexander put his gun down on a table, which was only a slight relief because he still looked like he could kill someone with his bare hands.  
"Leave, then," the blond (maybe Jake?) hissed.  
"Fine," Magnus replied, "though I do believe I was the one held at gunpoint. Isabelle, lovely to meet you, Blondie, I'd rather never see you ever again and Alexander,"  
Magnus grinned at him and winked.  
"Call me?"  
He blushed bright red, which was unexpected and adorable. Alexander Lightwood didn't seem like the kind of person to get embarrassed, yet it was one of the cutest things Magnus had ever seen.  
Isabelle laughed and shot him a dazzling smile.  
"I like you,"  
"Lovely to hear it. I like you and fifty percent of your brothers,"  
Jace scowled at him, looking practically murderous.  
"Leave. Now,"  
"Fine," Magnus huffed, "but I don't believe I was talking to you,"  
And because he really didn't want to be stabbed by Alexander's brother, he left.

~

"What the heck, Alec?" Izzy demanded, "I leave for ten minutes and you go on a date?"  
"You were gone for three hours," Alec pointed out, "and it was just coffee!"  
"Just coffee?" Izzy scoffed, dropping her purse on the table, "like I believe that. Tell me everything!"  
"It was just coffee," Alec repeated.  
"Did you kiss?"  
Izzy smiled even wider as Alec blushed and looked away.  
"You did!" She cried, "my big brother has finally-"  
"If you were about to say 'got a life'" Alec interjected, "don't."  
Izzy rolled her eyes and hugged him.  
"I was going to say 'got a boyfriend', but that works too,"  
"Lovely, Izzy,"  
"You know I'm kidding, Alec," she grinned, "I'm just so proud of you,"  
"Thanks, Iz. I love you,"  
"I love you too, big brother. Now how was your date?"

~

Alec did not want to be shot on his first date. It was really not going to plan.  
It started rather well, considering Alec had almost killed him a few days before, something Magnus just laughed off and Alec profusely apologised for. They got coffee at a place Jace had once worked and tried to rename Java Jace instead of Java Jones and Alec tried not to show how horrified he was at the amount of sugar Magnus could fit into a cup of coffee.  
"You drink black coffee?", Magnus asked (he was not as good at hiding his horror), "It's like a cup of pure bitterness!"  
"I like it!" Alec protested, "it's not that bad!"  
Magnus was about to say something (undoubtedly stupid and annoyingly endearing) when Alec found himself wrenched out of his seat and held at the wrong end of a Glock 17. The wrong end being the barrel.  
Surprisingly, he wasn't even scared. His first thought was 'why the fuck can't I have a single date without being attacked?' and his second thought was 'why the hell did they make plastic guns?'. It was really not the time to be thinking of the material firearms were made of, he decided and focused on kicking the person who had grabbed him in the shins.  
"Don't move," they snarled and Alec decided to listen to the guy with the gun (and his arms were pinned to his sides, so that didn't really help) (it was definitely a guy or a girl with a really, really deep voice).  
"What the hell is going on?" Magnus demanded, standing up and glaring over Alec's shoulder (so the guy was taller than him. Alec couldn't help be a little annoyed by this). People stated screaming. Very loudly. It was interesting how much noise people could make if they put their minds to it. Alec probably should have been panicking, but he found himself watching the mad rush for the door with faint amusement.  
"Where the hell is it?" The guy demanded and it took Alec a second to realise he was talking to Magnus, because he had also hidden his fair share of important things over time. Including a multi million dollar diamond necklace that people were still hunting him for (he would never admit he had given it to Izzy).  
"I don't have it," Magnus snapped, "now let him go,"  
The barrel of the gun pressed even closer to Alec's head and he felt the first trickle of fear and adrenaline in his blood.  
"Where is is?" He repeated, sounding furious.  
Furious was dangerous. Furious was unpredictable. Furious might be about to get Alec killed. Well fuck.  
He could hear someone outside yelling about the police, which would not help much because his criminal record was about as long as the word pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. So he did the first reckless and stupid yet rather effective thing that came into his head and kicked the guy holding him. Hard. Between the legs. There was a noise like a dog toy being murdered and Alec found that his captor was actually rather willing to let go of him. While the guy was temporarily distracted rolling around on the floor in agony, Alec grabbed Magnus's hand and ran as fast as he could out of the back door. They finally stopped running a few blocks away just a sirens started sounding in the distance. Alec couldn't bring himself to let go of Magnus's hand and despite how cliché and stupid it was, he found himself blushing a bit.  
"That was terrifying," Magnus said after recovering his breath.  
"I was the one held at gunpoint," Alec pointed out, managing to scowl at him.  
"No, not that. You. Please never kick me,"  
Alec rolled his eyes and leaned back against the wall.  
"So do you want to try another date?" He asked, surprising himself, "Maybe without the crazy gunmen?"  
"That sounds great," Magnus said and then someone kissed someone else (Alec wasn't sure who) and he really didn't care it was Magnus's fault he had almost been shot because as cliché as it sounded, he felt like he was on top of the world and nothing else mattered.

~

"So how was it?" Izzy repeated.  
Alec shrugged.  
"We just went out for coffee. Uneventful. Nothing much happened,"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this late at night. Sorry if it's weird or too short.

The ability to make edible food, Alec decided somewhat despairingly, seemed to have skipped a generation in the Lightwood family. So the microwave was broken, the kettle was on fire and Magnus would be arriving in five minutes. Alec was not having a good day.  
The doorbell rang and Alec's mind supplied him with an interesting list of swear words. Taking a deep breath, he dropped the kettle in the sink, threw a cloth over it in an attempt to put out the flames and hurried over to the door.  
As ever, Magnus looked great and Alec was suddenly aware that his shirt had six holes in it. He knew because he had counted the week before when deciding whether to throw it away or not.  
"Is your sink meant to be on fire?" Magnus enquired and Alec turned to see the cloth had caught light. Muttering some of the more colourful profanities he knew he bolted over and turned the tap on, managing to prevent his second first date from, quite literally, going up in flames.  
"Sorry about that,"  
"It's fine," Magnus said, "this is actually going rather well considering I haven't seen any gunmen in the past few hours,"  
Alec smiled at him and suddenly wondered how he liked Magnus so much. It had taken Clary months before Alec would do anything other than glare at her, and Simon at least half a year before Alec called him anything other than 'Lewis' or 'the little girl's annoying friend'. He was pretty sure this was a crush. And he really hoped he didn't mess it up.  
"We probably shouldn't eat that," he admitted, gesturing to the weird lumpy thing in the pot that was meant to be pasta.  
"I know a great pizza place," Magnus suggested and Alec found himself smiling again.  
"That sounds great,"

Two hours later, after a heated argument on whether pineapple should be allowed on pizza, an angry phone call from Jace ('Alec, who the fuck puts a leather jacket in the washing machine?') and a lot of kissing (but still not enough in Alec's opinion) Magnus left.  
"Are you free next Friday?"  
And through a lot of blushing and stammering Alec managed to make another date with arguably the most attractive man in New York.  
Needless to say, Alec's second first date went very well.

~

It was funny how little killing affected him after the first time, Alec thought as blood swirled through the cracks in the pavement. Magnus seemed unfazed too, looking down at the body with only mild interest. It was weird that his boyfriend (the word still made his heart flutter) had done more illegal things than him.  
"We have six hours until rigor mortis," Alec said, surprising himself with how casual it was, "if anyone asks we were watching Twilight?"  
Magnus laughed and took his hand.  
"We're going to need to think of a movie a sane person would watch,"  
"Dirty Dancing?"  
"This isn't the 80s, Alexander,"  
Alec rolled his eyes. It was weird how they could joke around next to the body of the man Alec had just shot but it was easy. Everything with Magnus was easy. He could talk to him more comfortably than with Jace at times.  
Anyway, in his defence the man deserved it. No one messed with Alec's sister and he was probably the reason most people didn't. After the first few bodies turned up, Alec found the guys Izzy was with often avoided him like the plague, except Simon who Alec was pretty sure didn't know the meaning of the words 'leave me the hell alone, Lewis' and 'I swear to god if you don't shut up I'll break your jaw'. Despite such exchanges, Alec found Simon was his favourite of Izzy's boyfriends. But he was admittedly happier when they broke up.  
The blood had almost trickled onto the road and Alec put his gun back in his pocket and took Magnus's hand, feeling ultimately more daring than when he had pulled the trigger and made sure no one hurt his little sister and lived.  
"I think I love you," he said without thinking.  
He inwardly cursed himself. Magnus deserved better than a bloody alleyway and a confession from a lovesick technical serial killer. Alec really needed to filter his words.  
Magnus didn't reply for a moment and Alec suddenly felt nauseated. Why had he said that? Was it too soon? Did Magnus not like him? Had he-  
Then Magnus squeezed his hand gently.  
"I think I love you too,"  
And then Alec realised there was no 'I think' necessary.


End file.
